Day 359, Say It

So many things are left unsaid in our lives. Some of us have secrets and others keep things to themselves for fear of rejection. Over time, we learn to not say things. Of course, there is a healthy aspect to not saying everything that is on your mind. We do need to edit ourselves or we isolate ourselves from others. Often, though, we don't say the things that would change someone's life for the better.

I have a friend who longs to hear his father say, "I'm proud of you." He'll never hear those words because his father passed away almost a decade ago. I know what it's like to have a father say those words. I can remember the day my Dad said the following words: "I'm proud of you", "You're a great father",  and, "I appreciate our friendship." Those words changed my life. We need others to see things in us that we don't see in ourselves. And, we all know that we can make things up in our minds but when someone close to you says something affirming, it becomes true.

Today, I've been trying to practice speaking life changing things to those around me. It's best if you can be specific. Don't just say, "I love you." Tell the person what you love about them. It takes some practice to be specific. Personally, I know that I've become lazy with my words. I don't want to be lazy with my words for another day.

Rabbi Joseph Telushkin wrote a book several years ago titled, "Words that Hurt, Words that Heal." In it he describes the power of the tongue. He asserts that we really do have the power to create or to destroy. We can heal or wound. With a word, I can change someone's life. Isn't that amazing! Try it. You don't have to travel to a third world country to change someone's life. You don't even have to spend money. The greatest gift you can give someone is the gift of your words. When they are chosen carefully. When they are true. When they give someone courage.

Don't wait to say what needs to be said. Tell someone you forgive them...now. Set yourself and them free. Tell someone you're sorry...now. Choose humility quickly. Tell the people around you what they mean to you. You may not have another chance.

In the last year of my life, I'm going to say things that change people's lives. I'm going to believe that I have the power in my tongue to create and to heal. And, I'm going to hold back when I'm about to say something destructive. My words are going to matter more this year.

For now, Wade.